waiting...

Somewhere in the last few days (on a blog I read, I am sure), I came across this quote:

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on...
Robert Frost

I have been thinking about these words ever since I read them. I recall hearing this quote at some point in my past, but it was when I read it recently that it resonated with me in a way that stuck.

My grandfather is back in the hospital. He is bleeding internally. This is all I know. They thought he was okay. It doesn't seem that he is. I don't know anything else. I am sitting in the quiet of my home trying to work and mostly I am scared. My eyes are puffy from crying and my head feels full of snot. He is so far away and there isn't anything I can do right now but wait. And try not to jump to conclusions or let fear take over. So I wait.

Wait for that phone to ring.

I have been listening to a song over and over again lately...Kelly put it on a CD she made me after we connected at ArtFest last year. The song is called "We Walk the Same Line" (by Everything but the Girl). There is a line about how loud the phone rings when you're waiting for news. Yes.

And no matter what that news is. Good news. Things are just the same news. I don't know anything news. The worst news. Life just keeps going. That is the one certainty.

So I sit with this idea: When we realize that this is it, that life goes on, we then have the choice to decide how we will live in this life. Every day, you have this choice. Because every day the world just keeps going on around you.

Right now my choice is to realize that today is a day when I don't have the energy to go it alone. So I am asking you to take a second or two and send positive thoughts/energy/prayers to my grandfather in South Carolina. {thanks}

********

And if these troubles
should vanish like rain on midday,
well I've no doubt there'll be more.

And we can't run and we can't cheat,
cause babe when we meet
what we're afraid of,
we find out what we're made of.

So if you loose your faith babe,
you can have mine,
and if you're lost,
I'm right behind,
cause we walk the same line.

When it's dark baby,
there's a light I'll shine,
and if you're lost,
I'm right behind,
cause we walk the same line.

(lyrics from "We Walk the Same Line" by Everything but the Girl)