asking questions {a guest post from meghan o'rourke lecates}

June 28, 2010liz lamoreux

while we are soaking up the wonder of a newborn in the house, a few of my blogging friends are sharing some guests posts...enjoy these musings from Meghan O’Rourke LeCates.

*****

one of the most powerful + life-saving tools
i use
to grow + mend + thrive
{perhaps my first real tool in this realm of grow + mend + thrive}
is this:
asking questions

yes
this asking questions
coming from
{mostly in my younger years + sometimes still}
shy me
easily red-faced {to match my hair} me
the one who didn’t want to raise her hand
to draw attention to herself

asking questions = scary

someone{s} would be looking at me
focused on me
maybe even
seeing me

{i have long danced with:
i don’t want to be seen + i want to be seen
of course, you know, it’s all about wanting to be seen
yes, even the “i don’t want to be seen!”
is about this:
“i want to be seen”}

yes, me
asking questions

the one who didn’t want to ask
because it would mean
i didn’t know
and
“shouldn’t” i already know?

i thought i was supposed to know things

{how i was just supposed to know
i don’t know
but i was supposed to know
you know?}

if i didn’t know
it was on me

{a failure
a lack
on my part}

sigh

{can you identify with
any of this?}

yes
i started to ask questions
and
{at first}
not the kinds of questions you might expect
like
how does this work?
or
what does this mean?
or
could you explain that to me again, please?
{although i practice asking these kinds of questions, too}

the questions i started to ask
were questions i asked myself

necessary questions
questions
desperate
to be spoken + answered
hungry
to heal + lighten

deeply, deeply, deeply sensitive being that i was
{and still am
gratefully
with many tools in my ever-expanding toolkit -
i am ready for a toolshed}
i sometimes {= incessantly} thought
not helpful thoughts about myself
thoughts of the
i-am-wrong + i-am-not-good {enough}
variety

finally
one day
this question made it’s way
mysteriously
{it’s not something i had ever heard before}
to me
and
rose up
through me:
is it true?

is it?

Is
it
true?

one question

it changed my life

here’s how it worked
i thought a
i-did-something-wrong thought
and
i started to feel
low-down-dark about it
and then
i inquired

i started to do
some investigating
some excavating
with this
singular question:
is it true?

is it?

Is
it
true?

True
as it turned out
mostly was
{always, even}
something else entirely

i don’t ask
is it true?
as much anymore

in this case
i do
just know

a question i ask a lot now is:
what do i need?

what do
i
need?

truly need?

i also ask:
does this resonate?
and
is this aligned?

i dwell in the asking of this:
what am i grateful for?

i am newly inspired + guided by this question:
what is the most playful + lighthearted choice i can make right now?

i wonder:
what question(s} are you asking?
how is this question{s} changing your life?

*****

Meghan O’Rourke LeCates is an ordained interfaith minister, ceremony designer + officiant, Reiki Master practitioner, spiritual director + coach and inspirational writer. Her motto these days: Rise + Shine!