what is real (september 15)

you are doing it.
all of it.
you are stumbling
and laughing
and learning
and opening your heart more each day.
you are finding a rhythm.
you are remembering to breathe deeply
and sit inside truth and feelings and hope.
you are exactly where you need to be.

*****

::what is real:: is a mirror self-portrait photo + a few words series that began in july of 2010. the series started the first night jon and i slept for a few hours at the tree house while ellie was in the PICU. when i was by myself in that room for a few minutes, i turned and saw my reflection in the mirror in the room and had an urge to document the real face of that moment in my journey. looking back, i realize i wanted to feel seen by someone, and it turned out that being seen by myself was like a hand i could hold. 

as i continue to take these photos, i have noticed that the act of taking them feels like a meditation practice. before i take the photo, i stand in front of the mirror and think about what is real in this moment and let my face relax to wherever that truth lies. then i snap.

i document the series over on flickr but share them here from time to time.